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Looking back…

February 4, 2009

When I was little kid in pigtails,barely 7 or 8 I think I,I remember running after the bada bhaiyyas and didis to get anything done.Not my bhaiyyas and didis ,but those who were in the same school with me 🙂

What could be my ‘getting done’ comprise of at that age?:D Is that what you are thinking?:)
Well…….helping me in finding my lost tiffin / lunchbox was one, getting them to threaten children who bullied me was another…but the most important was backing up my stories and telling (read reporting to)Ma that I didn’t hit/beat up/threaten/push any kids in school no matter what the teacher told her.

(I had *contacts* even at that age…):D..I could have been a regular female don..:D

No,I was not a bully,but when given a shove by bullies in my class,I could give a whole push,a whack and then some..:D..tit for tat you see..

Even at that age,I would first run to the didis,all the older girls who seemed really cool to me.They seemed so much in control , competent and very authoritative and yet at the same time very compassionate.
I wanted to grow up and become the House Captains just like them.That was my aim in life:)

All my tales of woe narrated by a tear streaked face with a few lines of dirt criss crossing , were heard very patiently by them.The litany of complaints was long and never ending.

At the end of it ,they would make me wash my face,pat me on the head and send me off with an assurance that everything would be alright.

I always believed them and I was never let down.
I didnt ‘know’ these girls,they just used to come in the same school bus with me and some of them lived in my locality.

As I grew up,I always carried that awe for older didis around with me.They were so much in command,very intelligent and quite sensitive.
And they always seemed to be in total control.

As I moved up to class 11th and onwards,I distinctly remember feeling quite intimidated by all the college girls who always looked so chic .They always looked beautiful,not a hair out of place,the dress seemed to be thrown on at the last moment and oh so casual and yet seemed amazing,the hands and feet looked so perfect and delicate.

My nails were always half chewn.My hair was frizzy and my idea of an ‘awesome dress’ consisted of one pair of baggy jeans thrown on as if in the middle of a hurricane and one really baggy tee shirt which seemed to have seen better days.

My feet? *sigh* dont talk about them.I only wanted to walk barefeet.I couldn’t stand shoes and slippers.Ma gave up trying to make me wear them after some time.So I ,always ended up with muddy feet.(We had a garden that I loved):)
I still hate shoes/sandals/slippers.I feel most at home when walking barefeet.

So this was how it was in the last years of school.A curiousity and an admiration for all these ‘chic ‘ girls who seemed so darn sure of themselves.They seemed feminine.I positively yearned to be like them.

Two years later,I entered college for the first time.I was intimidated,scared and just plain nervous.The college I had taken admission in was an all girls college.
While this did not have any effect on me (I figured I would get a degree at the end of three years & that was enough) my ‘cooler’ friends from school pronounced this development as quite ‘uncool’and ‘not with it’.
What was I to do in a girls college?Girls colleges were full of boy/guy starved girls ,didn’t I know that?I was told.

”Look at all the all girls schools.” ”They are so pathetic really.Always trying to catch the attention of the guys.” ”And my god that is so cheap acting like that to get a BF” (boyfriends were always referred to as BF,so that the ‘cool’ quotient wouldnt come down)
(Here a prominent south delhi school was given as an example as also the guys school that was bang opposite)

I listened quietly (because these were my school friends after all) and wondered as to what it said about them.The ones saying all these things.
What does it say about you if you cannot even bear to study in an all girls institution?
What does it say about you when guys are the end all in your life? When they are all that your life seems to revolve around?
Who was the hypocrite here?

Before I knew it, in all the running around for admission and the wait for the D Day (the first day when ragging was bound to happen),most of us had lost touch with each other.
Some had gone abroad to pursue higher studies,some had gone out of Delhi,some were in Delhi but in different colleges……

I felt completely bereft.Not a soul that I knew in this new place.I had checked out the complete admission list of the college just to see if I knew anyone but I couldn’t find any.No one I could chat with on the first day and pretend that this was alright.

On the first day,I decided to bunk college because I was scared of ragging.I absolutely hated the feeling of helplessness and of knowing that this was not my little cocooned world any longer.

No more Ma and Dad to pick me up or drop at a friend’s house.
Ma had already stated this very clearly after the boards…”’You are responsible for your own life.you will travel in the buses and no one will drop or pick you up.”
I was horrified.What was this betrayal all about? And here I was counting on them to make all this enjoyable.I had visions of taking the car going off to college when I wanted to(which was 11 am:D)and then after attending classes for an hour or so…going off with newly made friends for coffee or a movie…

This was not in the picture!I saw all my dreams crumbling down…
(Yes,I get overdramatic like this):D

So just because of this fear and the ragging one ,of course ,I happily did not go on the first day of college.

My mother enjoyed my plight a lot.
”You aren’t scared are you?” ”You can still go,it’s only 11:30 right now.”All this accompanied with a huge grin of course.

Anyway to cut the ramble short,I did go after a day or two…met new classmates and new professors.

Tentative hi’s and hellos ….some awkward smiles shared…a little casual conversation …and a nervousness that was palpable….

And I absolutely loved it.

The college was amazing.The faculty even more so.The girls came from all kinds of backgrounds which was something new for me.I had never seen any classmates outside of the armed forces background in school.We had all been similar then, with the same backgrounds,same stories,same upbringing,same liberal moms and dads.

Here ,for the first time I saw a new world.One where girls wore everything from the most gaudy ,to the outrageous ,to the sober to the most conservative .Some girls had parents so strict that just being allowed to come to college was a dream come true for them. Some were very well off and some not at all.
Some travelled in buses with bus passes and some came in a car of the latest model.

Some girls were very ,very conservative and judgemental ,some none at all.Some were very sure of themselves and all that they were.
These girls laughed uproariously and spouted feminist quotes by the dozen.
They seemed so free.They felt like freedom..

Why freedom you ask? Because despite a liberal upbringing I had always been bound by the social customs of ‘our’ society,the army one.
One could be a tomboy but only to a certain extent.One could be free in manners and habits but also had to act like a ‘lady‘.
Even if one’s parents were not the least bothered, various other less liberal uncles and aunties were.

I had always studied in co-ed schools.I had never known what it felt like to be in an all-girls institution.
The only all-girls school I had ever seen was the one where we sometimes went to represent our school in competitions.

They had always seemed a different world altogether.
And now I was a part of that world.

In this world,one didn’t have to worry about trivial things like wearing the ‘right’ clothes or not talking about ‘certain’ topics which were forbidden otherwise.
One could laugh like a lunatic and no one would notice and point out that it was not ladylike,there was no ‘preening’ for guys,there was no jealousy and no hard feelings,our jokes were *ahem* quite our own….not fit for outside company and yet there was no fear ”koi sun lega”,we didn’t give a damn..

Some of them were our seniors.
They welcomed us into their group.They were always ready with smiles and with encouragement.
There was no notion of ‘beautiful’ or ‘pretty’ or ‘hep’.
We just simply were.
Girls on our journey to being a woman..

We had this amazing collection of girl jokes….The kind that only we understood.:D
Our professors would come and sit with us side by side in the winter sun.We had long chats on love,life …on what it meant to be a woman in India.

We were a boisterous group of girls who discovered and found our independence.
We could wear what we liked.Some of the girls came in their pajamas ,some in their shorts,some under a veil ,some dressed casually….and yet all of us used to sit there discussing everything under the sun ,as equals ,as members of the same family.

We bunked college,went for completely nonsensical movies….:)….loitered around the campus like it was our own territory…no guy could enter the college gates without feeling a twinge of apprehension…:D
None dared… 😀
All the girls sat as they liked, not giving a damn about who was watching….
or about propriety…..
We learnt how much power a simple ‘group’ had when we went out for just a coffee…
No one dared to approach a group of crazy,rambunctious,indocile girls who looked like they could do ‘god knows what’ at the drop of a hat…

WE could and did take on guys who thought they were god’s gift to women,in buses,at movie halls,in markets……..but we also had the power of numbers on our side….

But the feeling it gave us was exhilirating to say the least….it sowed the seeds of a confidence that has bloomed in all of us now..
Because we know what power felt like if only for a moment….indeed feels like still…
Our,bodies ,identities….and beliefs….they were all our own..

We did not need men to fight our battles for us…

The way we dressed too said a lot about us and about how we were evolving….
In the first year it was all about casual…translation:-throw on a pair of jeans and a casual top,scrub your face clean,lather on sunscreen and voila!one was ready for college!:)
I felt ‘cool’ even in that ensemble..:D

Second year of college was all about letting out the feminist in ourselves….we had graduated to khadi kurtas with kolhapuri chappals….a jhola with mirror work to add the ethnic touch:)a dash of kaajal and one felt ready to take on the world!:)
We wore boho chic skirts ,long flowing ones,with huge folders and study notes in our hands for added effect…
We had the bohemian look down pat..:)

We walked,we trudged…we shared endless cups of chai in the college cafetaria…..tapped our feet to ‘hep’ music as well as the kitschy one….

Third year?:) That was about abandoning all pretenses and letting go of outer influences….‘wear what you are comfortable in’was the new mantra…..Whatever we wore was chic…:)because we were…:D
We could carry off any darn style in the world coz we knew who we were….:)

We thought we were rather dashing,classy,stylish. …you name it..:)
And you know what?I think we were too….because we had covered a long journey in a span of three years…a journey that continues still……

And for this a lot of credit should go to our professors,our mentors I think…
Our professors were amazing.They seemed to be from a different world altogether.

Some of them were married ,some were unmarried,some were divorcees,some had lost their husbands some time back…

Yet all these women were among some of the most awesome ones I have come across in my life.They were all the same.Fire brand feminists who inspired us to stand up for ourselves.They seemed to be from a parallel universe.
We didn’t just study history,we studied a discipline which showed us how women could be relegated to the margins of history and forgotten forever.

We pondered for hours,debated ,discussed on issues that till a year back had not even occurred to us.
We wrote critiques on the Vedas and on Patriarchy.We knew what Brahmanism stood for.
The world it seemed,was our oyster and we were ready to go out and shine.

It was where I discovered Gloria Steinem ,Maya Angelou,Anais Nin and others…
Betty Freidan whose quote has stayed with me till now..
“The glorification of the “‘woman’s role,” then, seems to be in proportion to society’s reluctance to treat women as complete human beings; for the less real function that role has, the more it is decorated with meaningless details to conceal its empt.”

We heard stories of how our professors,had descended on the streets at the height of the feminist revolution in india.
Of how they had fought for so much.Of all that was our inheritance.
And it was.As we all realized by the end of college.
We were not archetypes,Jungian or not.
We could be Kali or Lillith or Morrigan or Astarte…..
Some of us read and re-read all that there was on offer…
Feminine mystique…and others..

We studied Subaltern Studies and tore it to bits…
Where were we? We asked indignantly…

We could understand ,if not empathise when Freidan said,
“The problem lay buried, unspoken for many years in the minds of American women. It was a strange stirring, a sense of dissatisfaction, a yearning that women suffered in the middle of the twentieth century in the United States. Each suburban housewife struggled with it alone. As she made the beds, shopped for groceries, matched slipcover material, ate peanut butter sandwiches with her children, chauffeured Cub Scouts and Brownies, lay beside her husband at night, she was afraid to ask even of herself the silent question: ”Is this all?””

Even if we were yet to be married,our 18 year old minds tried to grasp the fact that there was more to life than just getting married and mouthing and earning platitudes….

We knew that marriage was just one aspect of our life,not everything..not the endall…
We started understanding what our professors were talking about when they quoted Steinem at us…“I’ve yet to be on a campus where most women weren’t worrying about some aspect of combining marriage, children, and a career. I’ve yet to find one where many men were worrying about the same thing.”

College was about bunking in groups and descending on my home to have long chats over chai with ma…
Ma was plain astonished to see this gaggle of girls converging upon her…:D
All of us,I and my friends realised what our mothers had lived through…we all took a little something from their experiences….
It enriched us in ways that I don’t think we even now realise…

Our teachers threw the most complex questions at us,waiting and watching to see how we would answer…
In the beginning we were zapped…
But slowly step by step…we searched for our own answers…each answer was unique..each answer was special…

And yet none of this was radical feminism or indeed feminism of any kind.These women shared what they had lived through.Of where they had come from and the baggage that they were carrying and that each woman,each one of us carries still.

Never were we part of any violent or aggressive demonstrations or any ‘naarebaazi‘.Our college did not allow any political campaigns in the campus.We were one of the few colleges untouched by the madhouse that were Delhi University elections.
And yet we voted each year for our own college president.We discussed who was a better candidate,who could handle things better.

Now when I look back I realise that studying in an all girls institution was the best thing that could have happened to me.
I now realise how important it is to have both experiences……a co-ed one and one where there are no inhibitions…absolutely none…of dress,of language,of character,of morality….

Women rock and I have seen how..:)

College days….They were all about the process of discovery….
awesome days,crazy days,the journey from being a girl to a woman…and all that was in between……..:)

My favourite Maya Angelou poem…..:)among others..:)
(applies to all contexts equally):)

Equality

You declare you see me dimly
through a glass which will not shine,
though I stand before you boldly,
trim in rank and making time.
You do own to hear me faintly
as a whisper out of range,
while my drums beat out the message
and the rhythms never change.
Equality, and I will be free.
Equality, and I will be free.

You announce my ways are wanton,
that I fly from man to man,
but if I’m just a shadow to you,
could you ever understand?
We have lived a painful history,
we know the shameful past,
but I keep on marching forward,
and you keep on coming last.
Equality, and I will be free.
Equality, and I will be free.

Take the blinders from your vision,
take the padding from your ears,
and confess you’ve heard me crying,
and admit you’ve seen my tears.
Hear the tempo so compelling,
hear the blood throb through my veins.
Yes, my drums are beating nightly,
and the rhythms never change.
Equality, and I will be free.
Equality, and I will be free.

Maya Angelou
Maya Angelou’s Poems

And yet this poem is not a lament or a question.
It just is.
An expression of the self.And a proclamation that no one owns me…..:)

23 Comments
  1. hitch writer permalink
    February 5, 2009 12:24 am

    I studied in a boys school till 5th standard, when we shifted and i got into a co-ed school for the first time.

    with a few months I was clear in my mind never a boys school or college ever.

    I dont know what you feel when you go to a girls college, its intriguing to know what females think.

    I am a male so I perhaps cannot quite always understand.

    I didnt despise with females who went to girls college but I thought the two were made for each other so I used to think the girls college or boys school wala’s were missing out on a lot of fun !!!

    College wouldnt be the same for me without my female friends…

    they were the ones who sobered us up…

    ensured we dressed a lil better, acted a lil more sensibly and taught us a bit of etiquette.

    Girls were the ones who would lend notes, spend time at exam times to explain us how to solve a balance sheet.

    Girls were the ones who would force us to attend lectures…

    Without girls where would we men be ???

    I would probably be still in college .. !!! lol…

    Thanks to the my girl friends i.e. female friends (girlfriends sounds better but) I studied, and passed !!

    So i would rather say you girls should come to co-eds and help us males out !!!!

    puhleez !

  2. Vinod_Sharma permalink
    February 5, 2009 12:37 am

    You are going to refresh a lot of memories…this series can be called ‘The Growing up of Abhilasha’ Very well written indeed!

  3. manju permalink
    February 5, 2009 12:46 am

    Great post, Indyeah! Nice to get to know you better! 🙂

  4. Indyeah permalink
    February 5, 2009 1:32 am

    Hitchwriter:-A huge thumbsup for that decision!:)
    Yes,anyone who studies in only one of the two and not the other misses out on a lot…:)But its only when you know what being in aboys school was like that you started appreciating the pros of being in a co-ed one..:)

    But I really would say that for girls who have not studied in an all girls insitution or for girls who have only studied in an all girls one,they really should explore the other option…:)
    Because it helps us in so mnay ways…:)
    If one goes from a girls school to a co-ed one,one starts to gain a new confidence,if one goes from a co-ed one to an all girls one,one starts appreciating one’s own gender and all that we are capable of..:)

    I think specially at the time of graduation as I think personally it came at an apt time for me…I was now free to think on my own..

    ”College wouldnt be the same for me without my female friends…
    they were the ones who sobered us up…
    ensured we dressed a lil better, acted a lil more sensibly and taught us a bit of etiquette.
    Girls were the ones who would lend notes, spend time at exam times to explain us how to solve a balance sheet.
    Girls were the ones who would force us to attend lectures…”

    Yes, we can see we are very useful:):)
    I do realize it is fun…and it really is…I still have guy friends I made in other collges.. ..but this experience for me personally was not something to be missed..

    lol@”Without girls where would we men be ???
    I would probably be still in college .. !!! lol… ”
    and LOL at girlfriends sounds better…:D

    Yeah we will help you…:)
    just need to discover ourselves first..:)

    I absolutely loved your comment and the honesty!:)thank you..:)

    Vinod Sir:-Thank you so much Sir:):)
    ”growing up of Abhilasha’:Dyeah can be called that…and discovering myself too.:)
    thanks a lot..:)

    Manju:-Thank you so much…:)Loved knowing you liked it..:)

  5. Sashu... permalink
    February 5, 2009 1:36 am

    I had a smile reading this post indyeah! a bitter-sweet smile! having been in co-eds schools n colleges all the while, i get the feelin i musta hv missed out n all de fun u gals had..that makes it bitter!! hehe!! 🙂

    N sweet..coz i found some of my fav mentioned in here – Maya Angelou for one!! Her poetry and spoken recordings have always amazed me…! glad to read her in here!! thanks for that indyeah! 🙂

    Unfortunately my college life hasnt been the best f times for me…feelin all bitter n jealous aftr readin ya! hehehe! 🙂

    and yea, more than anything, thanks for sharing the Maya Angelou poetry here 🙂

    keep smiling 🙂 God bless!!

  6. hitch writer permalink
    February 5, 2009 1:58 am

    I am Dhiren, I dont know why I named myself Hitchwriter, I dont even know what it means but the name has stuck.

    no need to thank, in these recessionary times with no work, blogs and particularly of yours keep me engrossed !!

    Keep writing and I ll keep reading !

  7. Solilo permalink
    February 5, 2009 7:17 am

    Abhi, I was waiting for this post. Read it several times and as usual some of the parts were me. Mainly the part were I wouldn’t bother about my dressing sense and my mom trying to make me presentable. What a change from now! Now I am a fashionista (a pseudo one still….) :))

    House Captains! my aim was too and I became one too. But you know the house captain would always be a Boy in our school and Vice Captain would be a Girl and only today I realized that discrimination. We were always second even then 😦

    Which houses were you in? I was mostly in Ashoka or Tagore house and sadly another realization is that we had 4 houses all names after men. I mean would it have killed anyone to name one house as Rani Laxmi bai House or Sarojini Naidu house?

    I was a girl in pigtails too and a nerd who was a bit tom boy too mostly in the way I dressed.

    You should publish your posts as a book. I would buy 🙂

    BTW I couldn’t find RSS feed button to subscribe here. I never bothered before because I would anyways check your blog daily:).

  8. Biju Mathews permalink
    February 5, 2009 7:54 am

    You started and ended it really well. Great Job!

    My younger Sister wanted to go to an all girls college. She seemed to be afraid of facing a mixed crowd. But I put my foot down and thought it best to get her onto a mixed college, to know men, to understand them, understand their faults and their weaknesses for I forsaw her to facing them as husbands in the future. She thanks me enough today as she is more accomodative to his jokes, his fights and his faults. I believe boys and girls should interact enough as friends so that the gender difference is understood in its depth and as men and women they become more responsible and adjusting as a family. Its just my view 🙂

    Keep Blogging!

  9. Indyeah permalink
    February 5, 2009 9:06 am

    Sashu:-:)Hey!not bitter sweet!coz evry place has its own charm!:)And also it depends on the kind of place one is in..I was lucky enough to be in a pretty liberal college..what if I ahd been in a strict one?:)

    It all depends…:)

    BUt I loved knowing you smiled..:)
    YOu are most welcome Sashu!:)Maya Angelou is somethig else isnt she?:)

    My college life wasn’t a bed of roses either…:D…just learnt to kick ass!:D…I just remember all the nice memories..:)
    You are most welcome…And whichever college you were in,see how nicely you turned out!and that makes it all well na?:)Smart college if they had you!;)

    You keep smiling too!:)

    Hitchwriter:-:)yeah I know that your name is Dhiren…just always called you Hitchwriter so its become a habit:)
    will call you Dhiren now..:)

    ”in these recessionary times ”
    :D…okay!:)
    and thanks:)

    Solilo:-I belive you must be a fashionista!:D…not a pseudo one!:P
    coz tomboys turn out to be the most stylish ones!:D

    House Captain?Wow!I was just an iddly piddly prefect!:D..
    I was in APS DK(you are talking about DK right?)…was in Nehru House..And in Mhow was in Sarabhai House…both had green flags…
    Yeah really crappy it was to name them all after men…and only guys as school captains?where did this happen?
    idiots all of them!
    Yeah apparently it would have killed them going by their reluctance….
    you would buy?*grinning*
    😀 I will courier it to you as a gift when that day comes!:D

    ”I was a girl in pigtails too and a nerd who was a bit tom boy too mostly in the way I dressed.”AWwwwwww!!…can just about imagine it…:D

    the RSS feed button didnt work the first time..tried it again…was about to lose the entire template…!!:D…*I am a klutz*
    will try and put it in place..

    :)((hugs))for those nicey nice words….

  10. Indyeah permalink
    February 5, 2009 9:27 am

    Biju Mathews:-:) thank you so much:)
    No,I don’t mind you saying that…
    as you would have read in the post and in my comments ,I am only talking about my personal cse…:)I was lucky enough to have been exposed to very liberal environment while growing up….and was equally lucky to get into a college where they were not conservative,infact they were very liberal…girls were quite bindaas there..:)
    The point is that I had already gained that confidence that you write of…I was confident,no over confident..had absolutely no hassles in talking to guys..thats why it worked for me….for me an all girls college was merely a new side of life,one that I had never seen…..for girls who have never studies in a co-ed of course an all girls colege is not a smart choice…
    one should experience both the worlds…but only after having gained the confidence….

    as you say,”My younger Sister wanted to go to an all girls college. She seemed to be afraid of facing a mixed crowd.”Great!You are an amazing borther in my book then!:)
    But I was never afraid because I had already gained this confidence having studied in a co-ed environment since childhood till college and then again during masters..:)
    for me it was just an experiment…

    Do I recommend co- ed or an all girls?I dont’ know:)
    To each his/her own I suppose!:)
    At the end of the day one should be a confident individual and educated and ready to face the world…

    do keep commenting!:)
    *whew**long comment*

  11. Chirag permalink
    February 5, 2009 7:30 pm

    *phew* Dude that is 3025 word of awesomeness. i had to take a print out :).

    @(I had *contacts* even at that age…):D..I could have been a regular female don..:D

    Ha Ha can’t imagine, a small pigtailed girl as a don, but well what can I say.

    @No footwear, mera abhi same to same,
    One day we were going to party Army Dad said “Wear Shoes look professional”. I was party ja rehein hai ya office LOL. I still wear sandals to office and I am in marketing

    As as Goonda Gang we were not intimidated by seniors I was already 5’9 when my tallest senior was 5’5 so you can imagine, bahut mara hai seniors ko.

    @Who was the hypocrite here?
    LOL

    @I saw all my dreams crumbling down…
    Niki is heights of overdramatic! Once we were late for movies and she’s like Chirag we are late hum barbad ho gaye!!! I was like “barbad” dude its a hindi movies even after 2 hours you can gues the story.

    @Anyway to cut the ramble short
    LOL

    Ya college days were fun we felt as we’ll win the world, nothing mattered, went to jail too… Ha ha ha (Don’t tell my Dad)…Lot of fun…being be that’s all..But somehow I feel now ..growing up sucks badly, I want to again go back as a small kid whose nose used to drip while running to score the goal, and nobody cared.

    Dude this is my longest comment 😉

  12. Solilo permalink
    February 5, 2009 8:50 pm

    Just like Chirag’s Niki’s ‘barbaad’ I too use words like ‘Dusht aatma’, ‘bhayankar’ casually and people give me that look :))

  13. Chirag permalink
    February 5, 2009 9:20 pm

    @Solilo: LoL ya.

  14. Winnie the poohi permalink
    February 5, 2009 9:35 pm

    Man that was some write.. I am envious of you now .. I always wanted all that u seem to have had.. companionship.. discussion.. and that poems by Mary is just too good!

  15. Indyeah permalink
    February 5, 2009 9:36 pm

    Chirag:-:D….heh!heh!
    how long was the printout?:D
    lol@small pigtailed girl Don…Oh boy!what a picture!:D
    ”I was party ja rehein hai ya office LOL. I still wear sandals to office and I am in marketing ”
    lol!you too?:)
    yeah shoes seem so binding!

    5’9!Bechaare seniors!!:D

    LOL @ ‘barbaad’ dude!!

    @heights of overdramatic…lol!
    yeah but it must be making sense to her…it does to us gals yu know!:D

    :D..*ahem*at went to jail too!
    :)yeah those were the days!!seems so long back now….:(

    yeah I want to go back to being a kid too! being an adult sucks bigtime sometimes!!:(

    dude I cretated a record on yours by posting my shortest ever comment !:D
    I tend to ramble otherwise!:)

    the ‘long comment was enjoyable to read…and I met Niki…:)

    Solilo:-lol!”I too use words like ‘Dusht aatma’, ‘bhayankar’ casually and people give me that look :))”
    😀
    I dont believ this!I say bhayankar all the time!and I mean ALL the time!
    This is so amazing in a weird sorta way…:D
    three weirdoes!!!:D

  16. Indyeah permalink
    February 5, 2009 9:44 pm

    Winnie the Poohi:-:)…thank you..:)But you know, I really dont want to glamourise an all girls college/institute/school life…:)
    I just happened to be in a really liberal one…where we learnt what independence was …
    Believe me,when I say that whatever I have seen of normal all girls schools /colleges they are veryy strict and very conservative….
    though of course not all of them..:)

    life cane be enjoyed anywhere ..just get the right friends….:)
    and companionship and discussion?
    well…you have them here now..:)all of us are your companions and we discuss evrything under the sun..:)I love your name btw…been seeing your comments on blogs for cometime!welcome here!
    off to your blog now..:)
    love
    Indyeah:)

  17. Ajit permalink
    February 5, 2009 9:48 pm

    sorry for commenting offtext… but your tag is done Indyeah…..

  18. Indyeah permalink
    February 5, 2009 10:01 pm

    Indyeah is not offended dear child!no need to feel sorry:D
    coming over now!

    Ps:-now I know why crazy lunatics refer to themselves in the third person..it makes them feel grand..:)

  19. Biju Mathews permalink
    February 6, 2009 2:35 am

    You are right when you say, “At the end of the day one should be a confident individual and educated and ready to face the world…”

    Your frankness in a blog is commendable. No matter what keep Blogging. It’s you window to the world you are living in, when you let out feelings and also let in some. TC

  20. Usha Pisharody permalink
    February 6, 2009 6:14 pm

    More of me… 🙂 But that does not surprise me, nor will it you, I think :D!!!

    It is surprising, that when people hear that you have studied in a girls’ coll. they expect you to be cloistered or perhaps frustrated… LOL!

    I studied in a girls’ school, which also ran a boys’ school, and there was interaction, and socials [lol, dances and all, would you believe? and so many romances flourished… :D!], so we did not miss any company of boys as such :P!

    College too was a girls’… 🙂 And we had the most amt. of fun there, despite the fact that it was run by Sisters, and the gates used to be locked… :D! We even protested once, unheard of in those times, in a girls’ coll. sat in a sort of dharna in front of the Princi’s office, shouting for the gates to be kept open… :P! Didn’t work of course!!!

    We had the best of lecturers too…! I did Science at the Pre Univ level [what is now called the Plus One, Plus Two..the XIand XII] in the hope of becoming a doctor, then did a week’s Bsc. when I did not get thru those ent. exams, lol, and switched over to BA, all because of some compelling lecturers in English and Psycho. that we had.. Socio was a Disaster with a cap. D.. 🙂 Still those werer the best days… the clothes we wore, the way we ganged up.. cut classes and went for a morning show, only to find a lot of my mother’s friends standing int he queue ahead of us… :P!! Got away with explaining that too… 🙂 It was them that were more shocked not my parents :D!

    As always, you fill me up with nostalgia, and your writing style is so natural and intimate that it makes one feel an instant connection.

    As Vinod Sharma says, you should make an attempt to serialize it, and to underscore what Solilo says, do try and publish them… 🙂 You have another fan here 🙂 🙂

    Maya Angelou too… *sigh*!

    And it’s great to see two daughters on the same thread 🙂 🙂

  21. That Subtle Something... permalink
    February 7, 2009 1:02 am

    Loved and enjoyed reading your post thoroughly.

  22. Indyeah permalink
    February 7, 2009 8:32 am

    Biju Mathew:-Thank you.:)will hope to do so in the future too.thanks..:)

    Usha Pisharody:-*sigh*a happy content one this time…:)
    I know…:)

    and lol@girls college…cloistered and frustrated…:D
    hah!in their dreams…..what we all are is neither cloistered nor frustrated but ready to kick ass..!!

    ”We even protested once, unheard of in those times, in a girls’ coll. sat in a sort of dharna in front of the Princi’s office, shouting for the gates to be kept open… :P! Didn’t work of course!!!”
    Oh man!Really?:D..lemme imagine this…:D

    ”cut classes and went for a morning show, only to find a lot of my mother’s friends standing int he queue ahead of us… :P!! Got away with explaining that too… 🙂 ”

    LOL!..can soo imagine this…only now can one look back and laugh…
    we found our lecturers sitting in front of us…during dil chahta hai morning show….:D

    ”compelling lecturers in English and Psycho.”that is what does the trick !awesome teachers are half the battle won!:)you would know of course!:D

    ((hugss))for each time that you say that…makes me sigh…and feel on top of the world..:)

    psstt…Dont tell her.:D.But I loved meeting your daughter too…:)A wonderful girl you have ‘raised’..:):)

    That Subtle Something:-Welcome back!:) where have you been?:(…plsss come and write no?plsss?:):)looking forward to it..:)
    and thank you so,so much..:)

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