They quote Kafka and Jung and Ghalib.
And pontificate on what it means to be a ‘liberal’. Endless pontification.
I know because I am one of them.
On what is ‘right’ and what is ‘wrong’.
Of having a spine. And standing up.
Standing up when they can’t .
They say,” but…but… you? ….he?……how?”
His is a free soul. Mine is bound by thoughts, opinions, books, words, others.
He is his own person.
He doesn’t give a damn about the world. Not when it comes to doing something.
He is a doer. I am a dreamer.
There is a madness in our love. The kind of love that comes when two beings who are opposites come together.
I cannot fool him. Do you know why? Because he does not carry the baggage of Kafka and Jung and Freud .
Because I cannot make a pithy remark on the frivolities of life and hope to get away with it.
Marriage. A meeting of two halves. A union of two similar beings.
But why? Why do we need to have things in common? I avoided ‘common’ like the plague.
Because the last thing I wanted to do was live my life with someone who had thoughts, opinions, values, judgements similar to my own.
We found each other. I don’t know how. But we did.
Different states. Different languages. Different cultures. Different backgrounds. Different outlook towards life.
Because he never makes me feel as if I have gotten more than I deserve.
And yet can you believe that both of us feel that we have gotten more than we deserve?:)
Because when his wife gets stubborn as hell, he stands right by her, come hell or high water. No questions asked.
And then gently asks her later,” Feel like talking about it?”
Brooding at times. Sunny at others. This man who is a little kid at heart. Who finds it supremely funny whenever I scream while watching a horror movie.
Who loves to give me the horrendous scares by sneaking up on me.
We are currently on 10-6 approximately. 10 being my score ofcourse. I have smartened up. 😉
This hubby of mine who helps me in filling up forms and it reminds me of ma and dad.
The care they took when it came to my education.
The way he reminds me to keep my admit card/pens/lunch. You name it. It’s making me smile as I write this.
When he paces outside waiting for my exam to get over…
Listening patiently to my rambles about the question paper, the examiners..
With a belief so strong that his wife will get through all exams no matter what:)
When he gives me a look in a room full of people and it speaks volumes.
A beautiful memory, a mischievious smile, a thought about something …all of it in one look.
When he tucks me in like a little kid coz I have been out in the cold enjoying ‘the evening’
and rubs vicks on a cold red nose…not saying a word because he knows me by now.
The let’s-see-who -kicks-the-other-off-the-bed-first game. laughing like crazy loons all the while.
When I write super corny lines while murdering a perfectly good (great) poem.
You bring out the army brat in me.
You bring out the indignant me.
The” how dare they?” in me.
the ‘let’s go on our own journey’ in me.
The ‘world can take a hike’ in me.
The need to drown myself in jasmine ittar and nothing else.
‘I shouldnt’ eat so many chocs.
and ‘oh what the hell!we live just once ‘ in me.
To eat your share of chocs too while you look on indulgently.
You bring out the bauble lovin prima donna in me.
and the anxious ”do I look good in this? in me.
The ‘let’s collect all mushy romantic quotes’ in me.
Ghalib & Saahir & Meer in me.
She is Language, he is Thought
She is Prudence, he is Law
He is Reason; she is Sense
She is Duty; he is Right
He is Will; she is Wish
He is Pity; she is Gift
He is Song; she is Note
She is Fuel; he is Fire
She is Glory; he is Sun
She is Motion; he is Wind
He is Battle ; she is Might
He is Lamp; she is Light
He is Day; she is Night
He is Justice; she is Pity
He is Channel; she is River
She is Beauty; he is Strength
She is Body; he is Soul
“The point of marriage is not to create a quick commonality by tearing down all boundaries; on the contrary, a good marriage is one in which each partner appoints the other to be the guardian of his solitude, and thus they show each other the greatest possible trust. A merging of two people is an impossibility, and where it seems to exist, it is a hemming-in, a mutual consent that robs one party or both parties of their fullest freedom and development. But once the realization is accepted that even between the closest people infinite distances exist, a marvelous living side-by-side can grow up for them, if they succeed in loving the expanse between them, which gives them the possibility of always seeing each other as a whole and before an immense sky.”
― Rainer Maria Rilke, Letters to a Young Poet
My soul is at peace.:)
Last year’s draft when I gave some crucial exams:)